⚠Siren Head⚠
By: JAMES
June 20th, 2010 Chicago, Illinois 6:37pm: Malachi Robertson was walking home from his friends house after school, he felt chills all through his body like he was in a horror movie. He was alone in the dim light. He turned down the alley for a shortcut only to see a man at the end, he squinted his eyes to see the man he was old and homeless. He asked Malachi to go with him, Malachi said “NO!” and ran as fast as he could away from the man, he saw his dad getting out of his car at the end of the street he was on and yelled out to him. “DAD DAD HELP HE’S CHASING ME!” Screamed Malachi. His dad ran to him and grabbed Malachi’s hand and ran to the house…
His house was the nicest one on the street. He got inside quaking and scared, his mom came in the foyer and comforted him. Malachi went to his room, turned on the light, closed the curtains, threw his bag on the floor and sat on his bed. His Xbox controller was on his bed, he picked it up and started playing. After 2 hours he felt tired and went to bed, but first he had to get some water and close the curtains. Malachi lives next to a forest so he likes to explore it. He grabbed some water, looked at the forest and finished his water. He went to put it down, saw something in the woods, he looked again and then put his drink down. He closed the other curtains first and the just as he closed the last one he saw it again… he opened them again and a 40 ft siren with slobbery sharp and twisted mouths. Malachi closed the curtans and ran to his room with terror. His mom and dad ran in and asked what happened… and got horrorfied by their dead son, chest ripped open and face torn apart.
Oh James. Well I didn’t expect your story to end like that. I thought Malachi would pull off some miraculous escape.
ReplyDeleteYou write well and your story created vivid pictures in my head like a movie - well done you! Great also that you are beginning to group your ideas into paragraphs.
Maybe a quick re read and tidy up would help this story be even better, especially where curtains are mentioned as your character had already closed them when he got to his room.
Good writing though. Did you get to choose your own monstrous topic?
Thanks I will work on detail more.
DeleteJames that was really freaky and cool at the same time good storyteller
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Thnx
DeleteHi James. Nice story I watch you tube and some people have played siren head and its pretty scary, and you see a mangled body so him being torn apart is accurate. I think that you did good job at describing the gore. Next time you should add a more describing words for siren head.
ReplyDeleteKia ora James,I like your story about siren head,Though it is kind of scary
ReplyDeleteKia ora James, it was really spooky at the ending where he dies but very cool also.
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